Schools
and families together:
Helping raise
children
of character
Parent Spot
for Parents of Elementary School Students
During the
elementary years, children learn a lot about how to get along with
other children, make new friendships, tackle schoolwork with
confidence and take on more personal responsibility. How well they
handle these new experiences is directly related to the lessons they
learn at home and in school about good character.
Character
education at home
Ways families teach about
character everyday.
All families are unique - so,
too, are the ways they prepare their children to act and react to
the world outside of their homes. Yet if asked to describe what they
want for their children, most parents would agree that their goal is
to raise them to be kind, caring and contributing members society.
This is character education in a nutshell. When it comes to values
and character, parents are their children's most important teachers.
There are many important ways that families can help impart
important lessons on character at home. These include:
Keeping a
predictable daily routine.
This includes wake-up
and bedtime at about the same time each day, clear plans for getting
cleaned and dressed and family meals together as often as possible.
When children know that things at home run smoothly, they are more
likely to feel calm and confident as they take on the day.
Encouraging
and modeling positive ways for children to handle their emotions.
A lack of emotional
maturity and ability to handle frustrations calmly are often at the
root of many of the problems children have in school and with
friends. Teach your children how to talk through problems. Encourage
them to count to 10, take a few deep breaths or find a quiet space
where they can cool off before acting on what they are feeling.
Teaching
tolerance. The
lessons children learn at home about acceptance of others have a big
impact on how they approach the people they meet outside of their
home.
Providing
active play time and downtime.
Kids' lives can become
very busy with school, extracurricular activities and family
commitments. Active, unstructured play helps children burn off
pent-up energy and anxiety. Quiet time-spent not in front of a TV or
computer but rather reading, drawing and writing-allows them to
reflect on things they have seen and felt throughout the day.
Adequate sleep helps them recharge their batteries. All are key to
helping children become physically better able to handle their
emotions peacefully.
Providing a
structured time and space for homework and lessons.
This sends children
the message that the hard work they do to learn is valued and
supported.
Helping
everyone get organized. Enlisting
children's help in packing lunches and items for the next day and
providing a space where backpacks are emptied and reloaded daily can
ease chaos and stress. It also teaches them to be self-reliant.
Assigning home
responsibilities to all family members.
Though it may seem
more efficient to set the table or put in a load of laundry
yourself, encouraging children to take on new and challenging tasks
around the house boosts their self-esteem and teaches them what it
means to be part of a community.
Planning
family service projects or civic activities.
Caring and concern for
others are at the heart of good character. There are many
opportunities for family service. For ideas, check with your local
city or town hall, religious group or such charitable organizations
as the United Way.
Character
education in school
In
reaction to school violence, bullying and general disrespect for
others, New York Governor George Pataki, in 2000, signed into law
the Safe Schools Against Violence in Education (SAVE) Act. This law
includes a requirement that all public schools in the state include
lessons in character as part of their curriculum from kindergarten
through grade 12.Though the law is new, helping children understand
and put into practice good habits of character has long been a part
of the elementary program. In light of the SAVE Act, schools are now
using a more formal curriculum on character that is taught directly
as classroom lessons. In general, the curriculum on character taught
in schools is based on a handful of simple principles. These include:
Trustworthiness.
Be honest and
reliable. Have the courage to do the right thing. Be loyal to your
family, friends and country.
Respect.
Treat others with respect. Be tolerant of differences. Use good
manners, not bad language. Deal peacefully with anger, insults and
disagreements
Responsibility.
Do what you are
supposed to do. Keep on trying. Do your best. Think before you act -
consider the consequences of your choices.
Fairness.
Play by the rules.
Take turns and share. Be open-minded. Listen to others. Don't blame
others carelessly.
Caring.
Be kind, compassionate
and show you care. Be thankful. Forgive others. Help people in need.
Citizenship.
Do your share to make
your community better. Obey laws and rules. Respect authority.
Protect the environment.
Source: Character Counts! http://www.charactercounts.org
Books about
character for kids
One of the ways children learn
about their world is through the characters they meet in books. Here
is a sampling of books that illustrate a variety of positive
character traits. For a more comprehensive list of books, link to http://charactercounts.org/booklist1.htmPrimary
grades:
Iris and Walter by
Elissa Haden Guest
Jamaica Tag-Along by Juanita Havill
Thunder Cake by Patricia Polacco
King of the Playground by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by
Judith Voirst
A Chair for My Mother by Vera B. Williams
Upper
elementary grades
Otherwise Known as Sheila the Great by
Judy Blume
The JanitorŐs Boy by Andrew Clement
One Grain of Rice by Demi
Because of Winn-Dixie by Kate DiCamillo
When Zachary Beaver Came to Town by Kimberly Willis Holt
A Night Without Stars by James Howe
Resources
for families
That want to
learn more about raising children of character:
Parents,
Kids and Character: 21Strategies to Help Your Children Develop Good
Character by Dr. Helen R LeGette
Being Your
Best: Character Building for Kids 7-10 by Barbara A. Lewis
Character
Matters: How to Help Our Children Develop Good Judgment,
Integrity, and Other Essential Virtues by Thomas Lickonahttp:
http://www.bu.edu/education/caec/files/10tips.htm
At this link to The Center for the Advancement of Ethics and
Character at Boston University, you'll find an article on 10 tips
for raising children of character.
For permission to reprint this
article, please contact the Capital Region BOCES Communications
Service by e-mailing us at
dbushsuf@gw.neric.org.
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